Friday, February 18, 2005

Mexican Pizza

The other night it was my wife's friend/ex-coworker's birthday party. These people are Mexican-Americans, the kind who were born and raised here and speak English like anyone else, but don't know what Seinfeld is and never saw 16 Candles, Better Off Dead, or Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and really love Warner Brothers characters like Tweety Bird and Taz.

We're friends with her and her husband and hang out once in a great while, but it's hard to relate comfortably to people so different.

They had it at a small local town, maybe 15 minutes away. I was thinking to myself, this town is ideal for fucking hot latin chicks. First off it's economically depressed, compared to, you know, me. I could roll in in my shiny new Lincoln Navigator with my big shiny rims and my TV and my stereo... a white guy can really clean up in that kind of atmosphere, especially a rich one. The other reason I was thinking it might be a cool place to scam on chicks is that it's so close to home, yet no-one I'd bang would ever be found in my part of my town, because that place like a Little Mexico, I mean, it's its own community and it's totally encapsulated. A great many people know each other or know someone who knows the other person there, and don't know many people in the more white towns. Then again, that might be bad. Especially since tons of people there know our friends, that couple. Hmm.

Her birthday party/dinner was in a small Round Table Pizza. Naturally I was one of two white guys there. It's a funny thing about white guys in Mexican families: now, you take a black person and stick them in a predominantly white high school, and on the first day of school s/he will be looking at the other couple black kids going "Well I guess that's who I'll be hanging out with the next four years." But white guys in Mexican families, pretty much they ignore each other for some reason. He didn't give me the time of day and I had no interest in him. Maybe we serve no purpose to each other. Maybe it's a primal thing Mother Nature programmed in, for interracial relationships: we know we're in competition so we keep our distance. We're both running the same racket.

Now, there are multiple types of Mexican girls. These ones were the apple body type, which is not my favorite. Short, skinny legs; wide, flat ass; plump body with an inescapable gut; really less of a gut than an entire torso fat barrel thing going on. Their faces are usually similar too; show me a neck-up lineup and I'll pick the apple bodies every time.

There was one there who was pretty cute. She could have been 17 or 18 but then she could have been 24. Her tits were SO big - and round - it was amazing. I compared them to her head and each one was definitely very similar in size to her cranium.

Her mom was the sister of my wife's friend's husband. She was my age or older and had the complete road whore/Harley/crank look to her: missing the upper corner teeth on each side of her mouth, one eye and one eyelid not pointing quite the same direction and a little slower to respond than the other, '80's hairdo, worn-out skin on her face, and jerky head movements. I just knew she'd have a blurry old blue tattoo either on her hand, her ring finger, or her lower arm. Still, she had started life as a cute girl and still had some of her looks. I don't know that I could even fuck her, I mean literally I might not be able to once I saw that big wide flat ass, but I could get a blow job for sure. Girls like her are usually kind of submissive and eager to please, so I should have an easy time getting her to get on her knees, open her mouth, and stick her tongue out so I could shoot a load on it.

She looked at me a few times and I gave her the look. She'd be very easy to get for sure. I gave her the eye a few more times that evening to plant - heck, with a girl like this it's planting and watering - the seed. You never know. I had a hook lined up - when either one of us left before the other one, if I could get my wife a few feet away so she couldn't hear, I was going to say, "It's very easy to see where your daughters get their good looks from." with my devilish smile - a surefire legs-opener - but never got to use it.

~

I still think about mall girl a lot. Does she think I'm older than 27? Does she think I'm too old? Does she know I'm attracted to her? Do I have the upper hand or does she? Would she cheat on her boyfriend? Is he a piece of shit or is he an ok guy? If he is an ok guy, will I be damaging their relationship if I get her to fuck me?

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