Friday, May 12, 2006

Let's try again

It's nice knowing there are people out there who read this, even after all that time with no posts. Thanks to you folks who sent your support.

So, I got the girl, the 21/22/23 year old. The deal with the age was that she had to lie and say she was 18 when she signed up for all these sex personals sites. So she's 21 now.

Anyway, I got her, and lost her. And got her back. Now she's back and I'm trying to be smart about it.

Loyal readers may remember I gave up the Mexican girl, my mistress, early last year, with two brief encounters but no other contact. Well, I got her back partway over the past few months, and just over the past few weeks, I'm pretty sure she's mine for the taking. But I'm not taking her. Amazing, huh?

I got the Domme as a good friend, lost her, got her back as a good friend, and lost her again. I'm waiting a while before I go after her again.

I also lost another friend, the girl who fucked the dog, but got her back, as a friend. I told her I want to only be friends. It feels better than ever right now.

I've got another couple girls on my workspace right now as well. One is a super-hippie-vegan girl of latin descent who is 27 and SUPER cute, and a single mom of a 3-1/2 yaer old.

The other is a hot Mexican American chick who is 39 but looks early 30's. She's fun and would get together with me despite having a boyfriend (he's 27. Good for her!), but for some reason I have zero attraction to her. On the phone we just don't connect so she seems almost like a dingbat, which she's not at all.

So far I'm keeping the vegan chick purely as friends and it feels good. She wanted to bone right off the bat but I just couldn't bring myself to. She's too angelic. She saw I on my profile on a personals page, that one of my Groups had to do with "submissive and slave girls group." I had figured that would be a place to meet kinky chicks of course, but I am WAY not into identifying with it as a "lifestyle." Being into BDSM anyplace outside the bedroom is like being into Dungeons and Dragons or vampires or gothic stuff - NOT cool when you're over the age of like 22 or so. Anyway she asked me, "I saw you belong to" (that group). "Could you help me to understand why?" Please. I like to fuck girls who get off on me taking charge and doing whatever the fuck I want to them. But she is so full of love and health and good and positivity that she'd never understand that. So I said I'm into the fashion, like girls who are into doing Bettie Page-style photo shoots.

In a way I want to be done with all the lies and fucking around but I feel like it's my lot in life. So I'm starting another chase. Isn't that fucked up?



~




I was talking to the girl who fucked the dog last week. She has a boyfriend way up North who - to my mind - is clearly cheating on her but she can't see it. She met him on the same BDSM personals site I met her on. He sets up these gangbangs, then comes down to L.A. and he and other guys fuck her while he takes pictures.

He claims he's living with his ex-g.f. who he's going to marry so he can become an American citizen. But I'm positive he's in a real relationship with that chick. He claims he and his fake fiancee are moving to L.A. and is going to be in a committed relationship with my friend (dogfucker), but I'm sure it won't happen.

She was asking about my booty-call situation and found out to her surprise I'm not fucking anyone at all right now. We had a big talk about it. See, I don't know how to get a booty-call girl, or how to keep one. All I know how to do is make girls fall in love with me, and make myself fall in love with them. There are fleeting highs but it's mostly tons of heartbreak and heartache.

Anyway she asked why I don't hit up some of these girls on the BDSM sites and get myself a booty call chick without all the complication. I told her how I never
wanted to hit up any of my top choices because there isn't an unlimited supply of hot kinky girls who are really good looking on those sites. I never want to try because I don't want to strike out. Because, I know I could get most of those girls to go for me if I were in person and in regular charming form. But it sucks that online it's hard to really shine, when you have to hit someone up out of the blue and don't have all these things around you to make jokes about or comment about or riff on, nor can you gauge their reaction and fine tune things and make adjustments in realtime. I hate the idea that someone I COULD have gotten, thinks I'm a dork, just because the internet came between us.

But I realized, if I don't hit anyone up, I'll never get anywhere. So I decided to hit up this one chick I've been lusting after online for three years now - another girl who lied about her age to register for a bunch of sex sites - and had never contacted, well, I was pretty disappointed to see she hadn't been on this one BDSM site for almost a year. Fuck. The chili spoiled in the bottle before I even opened it. But that's what happens when you pass on a perfectly good opportunity.

Then I noticed she had logged on recently to another sex personals site within the past month. Yes!!

I was going to hit her up but realized, I'm 36, and I think her profile used to say that about 27 was her limit, a year ago. Maybe 28 could fly. But once you put in your age on that site, it's locked in.

Luckily for me I already had two accounts on that site; one truthful one, and one that claims I'm 28. I started to rewrite that profile but I just absolutely suck at online profiles. If I try, whatever comes out of my brain is crap, and if I don't try, it's crap.

Basically, I rule, though. I'll admit that. You see, two days ago I tried putting her email address into my Messenger and lo and behold, the next morning it showed she had allowed me to Add her. Yes!!

Without ever chatting with her, today she sent me one of those sex survey websites. Her score came up as fairly kinky. I emailed her back with what I hope was a wise move. This should be good. I can feel it starting already.

I also found a way - damn I'm good - to correlate her email address with her Myspace. And I found her Myspace. It says she's 19. Doh!

What's strange is, no-one has left any comments on her Myspace for like a year. And she only has 23 Friends. Yet she logged in just a few days ago.

It's as if she has no real friends. In some of her pics she looks playful but in others she looks tightlipped and closed off. I guess that makes sense though - she's been on those online sex sites for at least since she was 16, so I imagine pretty much any girl doing that, has been molested and has a reason to be closed off.

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